"Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~ Plato
The holidays are always a tough time for everyone. For some it's the traveling, the traffic, the shopping, the financial strain. For others it's because grief and loss arrive during this time. It's like gravity. Happiness and celebration, needs the opposite side of the coin; sadness and quietude.
This year has been a very hard year for me and my family. For me, it started with the loss of my special pet, Tiki. She had a long and healthy life, but still, even after 16 years it was painful to loose her. I still shed tears when thinking of her, or when I see small dogs. Or hear about ailing older dogs. I'm not sure that will ever go away. She was my constant companion. My world traveling dachshund.
Then early this year we learned that my Mother has breast cancer, at the age of 80! That's nuts, and seems like a cruel joke. My mother is a strong woman, and has proudly tackled the nasty treatment that they make you do. But it's not been easy. Not easy for us, her children with the panic of possibility of loosing your mother. And not easy for her, of course, for the fear and the pain and discomfort of what she's going through. I think of her, and worry about her daily.
Then this week, my father, who has been suffering from the late stages Parkinson's and accompanying dementia, has been taken seriously ill. And the prognosis is not good.
My father passed away on Christmas.
It's so awful to loose your parent, no matter what your relationship. I've watched my friends loose their parents over the years, and dreaded the day it would come for me. Thankfully, I can happily say that my relationship with my father was good these past few years. He became someone I could really talk to, and confide in. It wasn't always that way. But there are ways in which we are alike, which probably let the bond grow. We know we have grown up, when we can see that the grown ups are also scared children.
I love you dad. I'll always remember the good moments and adventures with happiness. And the ones that aren't so, I'll warmly wrap them in my arms, acknowledge them and let them go.
|Me and Dad.|